7 Ways to Find Your Partner's Ring Size Without Them Knowing

by Patrick Adair on January 22, 2021

When it comes to surprise proposals, they're hard to pull off. After all, only 1 in 3 proposals manage to be a complete surprise to the other person. Most proposals require discussion beforehand.

But let's be real, surprises are the best and usually make for better proposals. The only question is, how do you pull a surprise off without spoiling it? Not only does it require stealthy planning, it requires the purchase of an engagement ring... and not everyone knows their partner's ring size by heart.

Below are seven ways to find your partner's ring size without blowing the whole plan!

1. Use a Ring They Already Own

Is there a ring you know fits them well that you can get ahold of for a few hours? Perhaps a ring they wear on their right ring finger?

This is the most accurate way to figure out your partner's ring size. Take it to a jeweler and have them measure it, or compare it to a ring sizer you can buy online. They'll be able to tell you the ring size and you'll be good to go.

Make sure they wear it on their ring finger, of course, as everyone's individual fingers are different sizes while typically their dominant hand will be bigger.

2. Ask a Family Member or Friend to Help

How do you find out your partner's ring size if you can't steal one of their rings? Ask a family member or friend.

They might know because it might have been discussed — and if they don't, the question is likely to sound a lot less suspicious coming from someone else.

Try to make it someone that they don't expect you to have any contact with. That way, when the question is asked from them, they'll seriously doubt it came from you.

Don't talk to their best friend much, for example? Sounds like the perfect person for the job.

3. Take Them Ring Shopping for Someone Else

If your partner really won't suspect a thing and you can get away with a little more, pretend you're buying a ring for someone else — a parent or family member, and take them shopping with you. Maybe your Mother's birthday is coming up and you want to treat her to something special.

While playing around and trying on rings at a local jeweler, you can encourage your partner to look around too, and keep an eye on the sizes they try on and what fits well.

Finding someone's ring size isn't easy, and there will always be a slight risk of giving the game away, so to be sure to really hammer home the story of whoever this ring is supposedly for. 

4. Buy a Ring Sizer for Yourself

If you buy a ring sizer for yourself and leaving it lying around, you can goof off at home and play around with it. Chances are your partner will get curious and try it out too.

Even if they already have an existing ring, they may still be curious what their actual finger size is.

5. Use The String Method

Is your partner a deep sleeper? If so, Put a piece of string around their finger and mark it while they are asleep. If done correctly, it can accurately measure their ring size. This can also be done with a piece of paper, although the string method tends to be much more accurate. Floss is a great alternative to string as well!

Of course, it's game over if your partner wakes up, so you need to be quite sure they'll sleep through this. Some people won't wake up if there was a hurricane blowing through the neighborhood, so this is the kind of person that this trick will work on. 

6. Compare Your Fingers

When holding hands or just playing around together, try to compare your fingers on their left hand. This isn't the most scientific method and it may not be completely accurate, but you'll get pretty close. Check your own ring size with a ring sizer then measure your fingers against your partner's.

It's not as good as having a solid answer but some people will catch onto any hints very quickly, and those are the people where it's important to be very careful not to give the game away!

You should be able to make an educated guess based on your hand vs. theirs and the most common ring sizes. This is obviously not the most accurate way to get an accurate ring size so you need to make sure the jeweler you purchase the engagement ring from will offer a free resize.

7. Just Ask!

If you're really sure your partner isn't going to catch on to what you're doing, you can ask. 

Say it's for something else or just in case you need to know in the future. They might end up suspicious but if you could really talk them out of believing you're going to propose soon, this might work.

If getting the perfect ring size is the most important thing to you, over ruining the surprise, then go with this method. Even if they guess what you're doing, it'll still be lovely when you present them with a ring that fits like a glove — and the most important thing is to take care of it.

Worried About Fit?

When trying to work out how to find someone's ring size, you might get stressed out. You might be trying different methods with no success, or be truly afraid they're going to find out what you're doing. Even worse, you might spending thousand of dollars on the perfect engagement ring but have it not be a perfect fit for you rpartner.

If you're worried about getting the size slightly wrong, then shop at a place that will be willing to accommodate you. You'll want to do research on different jewelry stores' size policies. Patrick Adair Designs has a free size-exchange policy on all non-custom rings - no questions asked! If your guesstimate ends up being off and you need a resizing, it's no problem whatsoever.

Shop for a beautiful ring for your significant other and focus on the ring itself, rather than the nagging concern that you've picked the wrong size.

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